Njengalokhu noma cha, ngezinye izikhathi inqubo yokuthengisa yokuthengisa kuphela esebenzayo kuyisondlo esinzima. Lokhu ubuso nobuso, isisu kuya kwesisu, ungabonisi ukwesaba , thola uhlobo olubhalisiwe oludayiswayo lokuthengisa. Ngokuvamile okuhlotshaniswa (futhi ngokuvamile okuhlotshaniswa ngokungalungile) nabasebenzisa abadayisi bezimoto ezisetshenzisiwe, ukuvala kanzima ngokuvamile akujabulisi noma kujabulise. Nakuba ukukwazi ukusondelana kanzima kungakuthola inhlonipho evela kubalingani bakho bokuthengisa, ngeke kukusize ukwakha ubudlelwano bamakhasimende obuhlala njalo.
Ukuvalwa kanzima akuwona wonke umuntu futhi kumele kusetshenziswe kuphela uma ungenawo amanye amakhono wokuvala noma okunye okusebenzayo.
Uma Zonke Zonke Zihluleka
Kukhona amanye amakhasimende ukuthi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uyayakha kangakanani umkhiqizo noma isevisi yakho, futhi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi umangaza kangakanani umsebenzi owenzayo enkulumweni yakho, ngeke ukwazi ukwenza noma isenze isinqumo sokuthenga. Nakuba kungase kubonakale kunesihluku, kungase kube yisikhathi sokuba ususe i-Hard Close kusuka esikhwameni sakho samathuluzi okuthengisa. Isizathu sokuthi isondlo esinzima kufanele sisetshenziswe kuphela uma konke okunye kungaphumeleli ukuthi ukusebenzisa okuqinile kungakhathaliseki noma konke. Ngezinye izinhlobo eziningi zokuvala, uma ikhasimende lithi "cha," usenalo ithuba lokuzama ukuvala ukudayiswa futhi ngosuku oluthile. Kodwa uma usebenza ngokuvala kanzima futhi ikhasimende lithi "cha," kungenzeka ukuthi wenza ngekhasimende.
Nasi inkohliso yokunquma ukuthi uzosebenzisa nini ukuvala kanzima: Sebenzisa kuphela uma ungenakho okulahlekelwa.
Umbuso Wakho Wengqondo
Uma unqume ukuthi awunakho okulahlekelwayo futhi uye ngokuzithandela uthintane nomphathi wakho wokuthengisa noma umqeqeshi wokuthengisa ophumelelayo, isikhathi sokungena esimweni sengqondo "esiseduze". Ngaphambi kokuba kuqale igama lakho emlonyeni wakho, kudingeka uthathe isinqumo sokuthi ngeke uyeke ukuvala kuze kube yilapho ucelwa ukuba ushiye, ithemba lakho libonakala lithukuthele noma uzwa okungenani ukuhlaselwa kwamakhasimende angu-5.
Iningi labaqeqeshi bokuthengisa be-rookie kanye nama-reps angaphumelelanga ukuvala ukuvala ngemva kokuthi "cha" bokuqala abazwa kumakhasimende abo. Iqiniso liwukuthi ukuthengiswa okuningi kudinga ukudlula u-3 "akukho, futhi amaningana athatha okunye okunye." Nakuba kungekho mithetho yegolide, ukumisa imizamo yakho yokuvala emva kuka-5 "cha" kungumthetho omuhle wesithupha. ukuthukuthelisa ikhasimende kodwa futhi ukulimaza idumela lakho emibuthanweni yabo yokuxhumana . Zama ukukhumbula leli gama, "Shayela ku-five, bese uhamba khona."
Yenza ukuhlelwa kwangaphambi kokushaya ucingo ukudweba indlela yakho. Ukuthembela ekutheni kwakho okusheshayo kanye nekhono lokuthi "u-spin" kaningi akwanele ukugcwalisa ngempumelelo ukuvala kanzima. Bhala phansi konke ukuphikisana kwamakhasimende ongakucabangela nokuthi uzosabela kanjani kulezi zikhalazo. Ngamunye wezimpendulo zakho-izimpendulo kumele ziphele ngombuzo wokuvala. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi lo mbuzo wokuvala "singakwazi yini ukuqhubeka manje?" noma "ingabe lokho kunengqondo kuwe ?," akukhathazi ngempela. Kuthiwani ukuthi ususa ukuphikisana komthengi, ngamunye, futhi uqhubekele ekuphikiseni okulandelayo noma kumbuzo wokugcina wokugcina?
State State of Mind
Ukuvala kanzima kudala ukucindezeleka, ukwesaba, intukuthelo, intukuthelo kanye nokubulawa kwamanye amakhasimende angathandeki.
Bayazi ukuthi uzama ukuwavala futhi wazi ukuthi abafuni ukuthenga kuwe noma abazange baqiniseke ukwenza kanjalo okwamanje. Uma uqala ukuvala, izindonga zabo zizokhuphuka ngokushesha. Kuncike ekutheni baphatha kahle kangakanani ukucindezeleka kwabo, bayoba abaqili noma abadangayo ngemicabango yabo.
Uma bebacabangi abanzi, udinga ukuba ube okhudlwana futhi uqaphele ukuthi cishe ngeke ukwazi ukuvala lesi sivumelwano. Uma kunjalo, ikhono labo lokucabanga ngezinyawo liba buthakathaka, udinga ukusabela masinyane futhi usebenzise isilingo uvala njalo ngangokunokwenzeka. Iphuzu eliyinhloko okumele likhunjulwe yilokho phakathi kokuvala okunzima, umuntu onokuqiniseka okukhulu nokuqiniseka uzowina.